OK, I guess it's not funny if no one gets the joke. My last post was Facebook-style, which was unrecognized by nearly every reader. Like my Red Sox, it was a swing and a miss. So here is a conventional recap of what may be the best ride in Texas.
Nine of us congregated at Garner State Park Saturday morning. Stanton and Loaf stayed at the Bates Motel in Leakey, joining us after what they termed "best breakfast ever" at some greasy spoon. This hurt the peloton, as the trip shopper (Ullrich) neglected to pick up eggs. For some reason, eggs were interpreted as the holy grail of pre-ride nutrition, beyond the yogurt, milk, bacon and cereal that made it in the shopping basket.
Despite the lack of chicken embryos, we all felt ready. We had 3 cameras and 2 video cameras, so this was about to be more documented than an episode of Cops. By the way, we saw a number of motorcyclists on the road that likely starred on that reality show.
We rolled to Leakey in a tight 2-line paceline, all nerves and adrenaline. From Garner all the way to the third "sister" it is generally uphill. In cosmopolitan Leakey we turned right (east) onto, you guessed it, 337. About 2 miles out of town we crested a little hill, and BLAM, there is the Hill Country. The Flowing Roads, Grace, Sisters.....Striking. While there was no Dalai Lama, you could feel the spirit of Texas.
Immediately, we started climbing, and immediately the group splintered. There was Mauricio off the front, and a few moths (Ticket, AT, Loaf?) unable to contain themselves, following the flame. As I said previously, the first Sister was the smoothest grade, and really the sweetest climb. At the top we waited for the gruppetto, and snapped some sweet stills. Turns out that Ullrich punctured at the base, so the wait was longer than anticipated.
Second sister was a little harder than the first, but no grades above 11% (i think). I climbed solo, as I now descend like a sister.
The third sister, if she was a breathing creature, would be termed a bitch. Closest to Jester of the three (but still no more than 12%), the climb took some effort, even at a controlled pace. Not sure who finished second, but Mauricio danced to the top. I know that Loaf and Ticket were in front of me, but I was not looking for polka dots at the top.
The descent from #3 was ridiculously fast. We all topped 50mph. Think Tumbleweed Hill, but 3 times as long.
With the big climbs over, we all breathed a sigh of relief. This was a tactical error, as we were only 30 miles into a 110 mile ride, and the Hill Country had some more tests for the Dough. Uneventful but pleasant roll to Medina, where we mingled with our motorized brethren, noting a pronounced lack of hotness amongst the better halves of the Harley crowd.
A downhill, upwind stretch to Bandera ensued, with Mauricio pulling the whole way. This segment boasted the smoothest pavement of the day, and we were lulled further into false confidence. We were met in Bandera by Toni, wife of Ticket, and their two sweet girls. They volunteered to SAG for the Dough, a first for any of our group rides. Since we had just refueled in Medina, Toni suggested she meet us a little further down the road. Utopia was the next town on the map (30 miles), so we said goodbye and kept the trek moving.
Chip seal was the reality of the day, and the last stretch gave us our fill. We hit some generally downhill rollers, and the pack splintered. I felt great at this point, and hammered for a bit. It was getting HOT, and hydration started to become an issue.
No C-Stores on this route. Only roadkill, vultures and plenty of flora/fauna-Hill Country Style.
Just as everyone was running dry, Mother Nature gave us a gut shot. Sucker Punch of a Hill, with 15% grade, pretty much out of nowhere. Combined with the lack of water and the growing heat, attitudes shifted from walking in the park to surviving to Utopia.
Toni was waiting for us on the outskirts of a town, her presence the only visible evidence of the town's namesake. Watermelon, Gatorade, sandwiches, fruits and some shade were all lifesaving. 19 miles left.
The rest was uneventful grinding.
Nine of us congregated at Garner State Park Saturday morning. Stanton and Loaf stayed at the Bates Motel in Leakey, joining us after what they termed "best breakfast ever" at some greasy spoon. This hurt the peloton, as the trip shopper (Ullrich) neglected to pick up eggs. For some reason, eggs were interpreted as the holy grail of pre-ride nutrition, beyond the yogurt, milk, bacon and cereal that made it in the shopping basket.
Despite the lack of chicken embryos, we all felt ready. We had 3 cameras and 2 video cameras, so this was about to be more documented than an episode of Cops. By the way, we saw a number of motorcyclists on the road that likely starred on that reality show.
We rolled to Leakey in a tight 2-line paceline, all nerves and adrenaline. From Garner all the way to the third "sister" it is generally uphill. In cosmopolitan Leakey we turned right (east) onto, you guessed it, 337. About 2 miles out of town we crested a little hill, and BLAM, there is the Hill Country. The Flowing Roads, Grace, Sisters.....Striking. While there was no Dalai Lama, you could feel the spirit of Texas.
Immediately, we started climbing, and immediately the group splintered. There was Mauricio off the front, and a few moths (Ticket, AT, Loaf?) unable to contain themselves, following the flame. As I said previously, the first Sister was the smoothest grade, and really the sweetest climb. At the top we waited for the gruppetto, and snapped some sweet stills. Turns out that Ullrich punctured at the base, so the wait was longer than anticipated.
Second sister was a little harder than the first, but no grades above 11% (i think). I climbed solo, as I now descend like a sister.
The third sister, if she was a breathing creature, would be termed a bitch. Closest to Jester of the three (but still no more than 12%), the climb took some effort, even at a controlled pace. Not sure who finished second, but Mauricio danced to the top. I know that Loaf and Ticket were in front of me, but I was not looking for polka dots at the top.
The descent from #3 was ridiculously fast. We all topped 50mph. Think Tumbleweed Hill, but 3 times as long.
With the big climbs over, we all breathed a sigh of relief. This was a tactical error, as we were only 30 miles into a 110 mile ride, and the Hill Country had some more tests for the Dough. Uneventful but pleasant roll to Medina, where we mingled with our motorized brethren, noting a pronounced lack of hotness amongst the better halves of the Harley crowd.
A downhill, upwind stretch to Bandera ensued, with Mauricio pulling the whole way. This segment boasted the smoothest pavement of the day, and we were lulled further into false confidence. We were met in Bandera by Toni, wife of Ticket, and their two sweet girls. They volunteered to SAG for the Dough, a first for any of our group rides. Since we had just refueled in Medina, Toni suggested she meet us a little further down the road. Utopia was the next town on the map (30 miles), so we said goodbye and kept the trek moving.
Chip seal was the reality of the day, and the last stretch gave us our fill. We hit some generally downhill rollers, and the pack splintered. I felt great at this point, and hammered for a bit. It was getting HOT, and hydration started to become an issue.
No C-Stores on this route. Only roadkill, vultures and plenty of flora/fauna-Hill Country Style.
Just as everyone was running dry, Mother Nature gave us a gut shot. Sucker Punch of a Hill, with 15% grade, pretty much out of nowhere. Combined with the lack of water and the growing heat, attitudes shifted from walking in the park to surviving to Utopia.
Toni was waiting for us on the outskirts of a town, her presence the only visible evidence of the town's namesake. Watermelon, Gatorade, sandwiches, fruits and some shade were all lifesaving. 19 miles left.
The rest was uneventful grinding.
Once back at Garner, we took a dip in the Frio, drank a shitload of near-beer, and ate like kings. Looking forward to making this an annual Dough Trip!
"Dad, it's time for your digital!"
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